It is known to be the best favour, inheritance, or
legacy the parents can leave behind for their children. It is far more important than family ancestry
and wealth, which are considered as nobility in certain cultures. Civility, as described in the footnote on
this page, is the root of ’imān (belief), and constitutes the worth and
value of an individual as human being.
It is the highest point of nobility with Allāh. He increases the rank of a
civil person, and loves the cheerful individual. He helps them on their day
of departure from this world, and leads them towards the paradise.
Civility (al-’adabالأدب), is a magnet of love.
It makes our word affectionate, and strengthens our friendship. It melts away our sins, and reduces the
inclination to make a sin. It also
provides a pleasurable life for all human beings. Conversely, incivility, and bad character,
destroys our faith, as well as our good deeds.
Failure to adhere to ’adab is an evident act of effrontery.
This section of the ahādith encourages us to
begin teaching all aspects of civility to our children as early as possible, to
only associate with people of ’adab, and to do our utmost endeavour to
act a civilised behaviour with everyone in the society, especially, with the
spouse and the children at home.
Al-’dab beautifies our actions. Even the best deed is not palatable, if
performed rudely. On the other hand, an
insignificant act can be cherished due to the courtesy and the civility of the
manner it is presented.
The most important matter is that this culture of mind
should be purely for the satisfaction of Allāh . In many cases,
particularly in non-Islamic societies, external appearance and politeness are
used as means of promoting business, or satisfying the boss, spouse, or others,
without the aspiration of satisfying Allāh . This type of
courtesy is not from the within; it is not genuine. It is a fake imitation, and cannot be adhered
to at all times, and all conditions. It
is a sporadic gesture, which can fool the person himself, and others. But if the civility is genuinely for the
satisfaction of Allāh, and for the purpose of well being in the next
world, then Allāh helps promoting this
ability in the person, internally. This
way his nature becomes polite, thus he is naturally courteous with all people,
in all conditions persistently.
Al-’adab is a divine grace favoured by Allāh, to His good obedient (ʿabd عبد). We should seek it from
Him, by obeying His Advice and that of His messenger (ph&hp). Without the Islāmic ’ādābwe are left deprived from His grace, as the great Iranian poet, Jalāl
ud-dīn Balkhi (Mawlānā) says:
از خدا جوئیم توفیق ادب
بی ادب محروم ماند از فیض ربّ.
Meaning:
We shall seek Allāh for accomplishment of
’adab,
Without it one is deprived of the Lord’s favour.